Drinker's Alphabet

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Once again, we present the following as part of our on-going effort at improving the level of enlightenment of our subscribers.

Drinker's Alphabet

A- Alcohol: The key to surviving life

B- Beer: It's what's for dinner

C- Class: What you're supposed to get up and go to after a Thursday night party, when you were still in school

D- Dancing: A favourite pastime of almost every drunk, usually looks pathetic

E- Emergency: The keg is empty or there is no one over 21 in your drinking party

F- Feeling Funky: Signified by leaning over a toilet puking your guts out

G- Games: Anything that involves cards, quarters and chugging beers

H- Hang-over: Reminds you of how great last night was and how much you drank

I- Imbibe: Eh, just another word for DRINK!

J- Jail: Where you'll end up after trying to use a fake ID or stagger home

K- Kissing: What you'll do to anything that moves after 15 beers

L- Lord: Person you beg to get you out of every situation involving alcohol

M- Money: That which you no longer have due to too much partying

N- Not Again!: What you scream when you wake up beside someone you don't know

O- Oh Hell!- What you say as you're falling down the stairs.

P- Pee: What you have to do every five minutes while you're drinking beer

Q- Quilt: What you puked on last night in bed and have to clean in the morning-YUCK!

R- Reform: What you promise god you will do while you're hurling in the toilet

S- Sex: What you did with that person you met last night while you were drunk

T- Twenty-four: The number of beers it takes ME to get drunk

U- Underage: Most of the drinking population in college town

V- Vodka: The mother of all alcohols and the best way to make Jello

W- Worm: The part of mezcal that reminds you of the porcelain god

X- X-Ray: How they can see into your stomach before they pump it (detox)

Y- Yourself: The one who drinks WAY TOO MUCH every week-end

Z- Zima: Zomething Different

Now I know my ABC's next time won't you sing with me!