An Invitation to SCTX

**Bumper** · 05-13-2005

The Christian Temperance Crusade

May 13, 2005

SCTX
San Marcos, Texas

Dear Scott

Perhaps you have heard of me, and my nation-wide campaign in the cause of temperance. Each year, since 1992, I have made a tour of North America, delivering a series of lectures on the evils of drink.

On these crusades, I have been accompanied by a young friend, Mr. William Sparrow. Bill was a pathetic case. A young man of good family and excellent background, whose life was destroyed by excessive indulgence in liquor. How much better it would have been if he had spent his life in a more useful and productive way.

He would appear with me at my lectures, and sit on the stage drooling at the mouth, and staring at the audience through vacant, bloodshot eyes, while I would point him out as an example of what alcohol can do to an otherwise worthwhile human being.

Unfortunately, last month wretched Bill finally succumbed to the demon drink. However, a mutual friend has given me your name, and I wonder if you might be interested in replacing poor William as part of my summer campaign, which starts in a few weeks. Please give this matter some serious thought, as I am confident many people more fortunate than yourself would gain a great deal of enlightenment from a person as destitute and devoid of moral character as yourself.

Awaiting your reply, I remain;

Sincerely yours;
R. Dawson
Reverend Robert Dawson

**sctx** · 05-13-2005

I'm a big fan of temperance...... five days a week!!!
IMHO, sobriety tends to be waaaaaaaay over rated

Dave y Stacey · 05-13-2005

DO they pay for the drinks while I sit on stage?

Seakony · 05-13-2005

He is not that devoid of moral character. Then again....

roni · 05-13-2005

Quote:

Originally Posted by Seakony

He is not that devoid of moral character. Then again....

I do know about that, but I do have a sense that he'll do to ride the river with.

Lil G · 05-14-2005

You guys are just baaaaaddddd!!!!!!

05-13-2005	#1 (permalink)
Bumper Class Clown Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: Winnipeg, Canada Posts: 10,200	An Invitation to SCTX The Christian Temperance Crusade May 13, 2005 SCTX San Marcos, Texas Dear Scott Perhaps you have heard of me, and my nation-wide campaign in the cause of temperance. Each year, since 1992, I have made a tour of North America, delivering a series of lectures on the evils of drink. On these crusades, I have been accompanied by a young friend, Mr. William Sparrow. Bill was a pathetic case. A young man of good family and excellent background, whose life was destroyed by excessive indulgence in liquor. How much better it would have been if he had spent his life in a more useful and productive way. He would appear with me at my lectures, and sit on the stage drooling at the mouth, and staring at the audience through vacant, bloodshot eyes, while I would point him out as an example of what alcohol can do to an otherwise worthwhile human being. Unfortunately, last month wretched Bill finally succumbed to the demon drink. However, a mutual friend has given me your name, and I wonder if you might be interested in replacing poor William as part of my summer campaign, which starts in a few weeks. Please give this matter some serious thought, as I am confident many people more fortunate than yourself would gain a great deal of enlightenment from a person as destitute and devoid of moral character as yourself. Awaiting your reply, I remain; Sincerely yours; R. Dawson Reverend Robert Dawson

05-13-2005	#2 (permalink)
sctx Reality Skeptic Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Body in San Marcos Tx....Tankah in my mind Posts: 28,813	I'm a big fan of temperance...... five days a week!!! IMHO, sobriety tends to be waaaaaaaay over rated

05-13-2005	#3 (permalink)
Dave y Stacey way into it Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: Chicago Posts: 242	DO they pay for the drinks while I sit on stage?

05-13-2005	#4 (permalink)
Seakony añejo Join Date: Aug 2003 Location: no longer in Mesquite with nothing to do Posts: 10,151	He is not that devoid of moral character. Then again....

05-14-2005	#6 (permalink)
Lil G añejo Join Date: Jun 2004 Posts: 2,415	You guys are just baaaaaddddd!!!!!!

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