This really sucks.....

08-31-2005

I get a call from Julie this morning, she says my mother finally got her operation scheduled, after 2 years on a waiting list. Guess when it is.... 2 days after we arrive at the Barcelo.

No biggie, I'll look into re-scheduling. I'm insured for this anyway, right? Wrong.

Turns out it isn't an emergency being a scheduled operation. Ok then, fine. I can understand that. So, I'm sure we'll be covered to fly back quickly if the operation turns bad...... nope.

Since I'm aware of the possibility of things going bad and we went on a trip anyway, no coverage.

If you float like a duck, you must be a witch, so you'll be burned at the stake. If you sink and drown, you weren't a witch.

The insurance company said there's a chance my claim for cancellation might be approved since there's much discussion left open to what would be considered "reasonable" and what is an emergency, regarding the 104 weeks the surgery could of been scheduled, and it was the same week we go to Mexico, but I don't know....

I can understand the insurance companie's view point, but it doesn't make me feel any better right now. I can cancel and risk losing $4,400 Cdn total for everything, or just $1,500 later if I need to fly back. Sure, the $1,500 is the obvious choice, but what kind of a POS son would go on a trip to the sunny Riviera Maya (that's how I feel about it anyway) when your 64 year old mom goes under the knife.......

Mom says go and enjoy yourselves, like mom's do. "Don't worry about me shunny, I'll be fine!!" said in a heavy Yugoslavian accent, while fogging a smoke.

I dunno.... am I a bum, good for nothing son if we go? Help please!

08-31-2005

I forgot to add, the operation, not to get into details, is "female" stuff/lower stomach. According to my wife, very common, and not anything to get freaked out about. It's still my mother though, regardless if it is a simple operation.

Kellyk · 08-31-2005

Quote:

Originally Posted by MikenJulie

I forgot to add, the operation, not to get into details, is "female" stuff/lower stomach. According to my wife, very common, and not anything to get freaked out about. It's still my mother though, regardless if it is a simple operation.

This does SUCK!

But I have to say being a female and facing a "female operation" that is also very common and not a big deal , I would kick someones butt if they postponed their 4000+ vacation to watch me recoop. Does she have someone there to take care of her or are you it? I don't know, I'm sure some would say I was insensitive but that's my 2 cents.

08-31-2005

We can arrange for help easily. I just feel like a thankless bastard for even thinking of going.

Nothing insensitive about your 2 cents, thankyou Kellyk.

Andiline · 08-31-2005

Mike, if this is 'standard' I would tend to say 'go to Playa' too! It's not as if you would be gone for weeks (from what I understand). So you might both get home at the same time. You can call her every day to make sure she is okay. I am sure she will understand as she told you so herself...

MY 0,02 USD

Andrea0

Nerak936 · 08-31-2005

No, it's not a complicated operation. Had it myself (although I was 39 at the time).

What I would consider is the "guilt factor". Are you going to be able to ENJOY yourself in Playa if you go?? Are you gonna get the guilt treatment from your mom if you go?? (even if she said "oh, go.... I'll be fine".... some moms are good at the guilt game) Are you gonna catch hell from your other relatives if you go??? If you answer "yes" to one or more or (heaven forbid) ALL of these questions, then look into delaying your trip. The "price" you'll pay for going (and not enjoying yourself while you're there cuz of the guilt trip you'll be on) should be considered.

If you answer "no" to these questions, and you can arrange for her to have the proper care when she comes out of the hospital, then GO. And have FUN.

MN Annie · 08-31-2005

This happened to me and I went; Mom said to go. It was our very first trip to Mexico and my mother was diagnosed with breast cancer about ten days before we were to fly out. I was able to enjoy the trip and not worry (much). She came through with flying colors and is still very healthy at the age of 85.

I had a hysterectomy several years ago. I didn't expect my children to their plans to watch me recuperate.

Go and enjoy! By the time you get home, she will just be feeling good enough to welcome your visits.

sunnygrl · 08-31-2005

Mike,
I'm somewhat confused. Is it normal for someone to wait for 2 years to be operated on? Does she live in Canada or the US? Is she close by where you live? I've never heard of anyone in the US waiting 2 years for a surgery to be scheduled. Do you have other siblings that can care for her? Will your name be mud, with family members if you go? I, too have had a hysterectomy (late 40's) and though it was a piece of cake, there were things I could not and was not allowed to do. If something goes terribly wrong, you can always hop a plane to her side. Are you a schmuck? No. But, only you can decide if this is what's best and weigh all the factors. She'll probably have to stay in the hospital for 2 or 3 days, so by the time she gets out, your vacation will be almost over. My 2 cents

dee

09-01-2005

The waiting game up here in Canada for surgery (at least in BC) is a long story, but yes it can be common in some cases. My mother was delayed so long due to her condition isn't as severe as others. If it was, it would of been done some time ago.

I live in the same town as my parents, Julie's family is based here also. Mom and I talked last night, we will stick with our trip schedule. She has help for her lined up, my sister is living in Burnaby, BC, but she's prepared to fly up if needed also.

My father had some serious surgery this year already, Julie's grandma suffered a stroke and is in the hospital currently, her brother has been in and out of the hospital due to drug related siezures, and I'm waiting for my scheduled shoulder surgery (torn upper ligament, no biggie, but it hurts like heck all the time). I guess I'm just a little bit "jumpy" when someone mentions hospital. I'd switch to decalf, but I don't drink coffee.

I do feel better after the talk last night, I'll just phone to check up on her.

Thanks for the feedback/support everyone, it was most appreciated.

Rissask · 09-01-2005

Quote:

I do feel better after the talk last night, I'll just phone to check up on her.

More than adequate, go and enjoy- it is not major surgery by the sounds of it- and if she doesn't mind- yer set!

One more reason why we never bother getting trip insurance.

It covers very little, usually!

Kellyk · 09-01-2005

Glad you got it worked out and feel better now

My dad says he's through with Dr's 'cuz everytime he goes they find something wrong

Really interferres with his vacation plans!

08-31-2005	#1 (permalink)
MikenJulie Guest Posts: n/a	This really sucks..... I get a call from Julie this morning, she says my mother finally got her operation scheduled, after 2 years on a waiting list. Guess when it is.... 2 days after we arrive at the Barcelo. No biggie, I'll look into re-scheduling. I'm insured for this anyway, right? Wrong. Turns out it isn't an emergency being a scheduled operation. Ok then, fine. I can understand that. So, I'm sure we'll be covered to fly back quickly if the operation turns bad...... nope. Since I'm aware of the possibility of things going bad and we went on a trip anyway, no coverage. If you float like a duck, you must be a witch, so you'll be burned at the stake. If you sink and drown, you weren't a witch. The insurance company said there's a chance my claim for cancellation might be approved since there's much discussion left open to what would be considered "reasonable" and what is an emergency, regarding the 104 weeks the surgery could of been scheduled, and it was the same week we go to Mexico, but I don't know.... I can understand the insurance companie's view point, but it doesn't make me feel any better right now. I can cancel and risk losing $4,400 Cdn total for everything, or just $1,500 later if I need to fly back. Sure, the $1,500 is the obvious choice, but what kind of a POS son would go on a trip to the sunny Riviera Maya (that's how I feel about it anyway) when your 64 year old mom goes under the knife....... Mom says go and enjoy yourselves, like mom's do. "Don't worry about me shunny, I'll be fine!!" said in a heavy Yugoslavian accent, while fogging a smoke. I dunno.... am I a bum, good for nothing son if we go? Help please!

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08-31-2005	#2 (permalink)
MikenJulie Guest Posts: n/a	I forgot to add, the operation, not to get into details, is "female" stuff/lower stomach. According to my wife, very common, and not anything to get freaked out about. It's still my mother though, regardless if it is a simple operation.

08-31-2005	#4 (permalink)
MikenJulie Guest Posts: n/a	We can arrange for help easily. I just feel like a thankless bastard for even thinking of going. Nothing insensitive about your 2 cents, thankyou Kellyk.

08-31-2005	#5 (permalink)
Andiline añejo Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Cologne, Germany Posts: 7,587	Mike, if this is 'standard' I would tend to say 'go to Playa' too! It's not as if you would be gone for weeks (from what I understand). So you might both get home at the same time. You can call her every day to make sure she is okay. I am sure she will understand as she told you so herself... MY 0,02 USD Andrea0

08-31-2005	#6 (permalink)
Nerak936 Cat-Lovin Nerak Bead Lady Join Date: Apr 2004 Posts: 18,614	No, it's not a complicated operation. Had it myself (although I was 39 at the time). What I would consider is the "guilt factor". Are you going to be able to ENJOY yourself in Playa if you go?? Are you gonna get the guilt treatment from your mom if you go?? (even if she said "oh, go.... I'll be fine".... some moms are good at the guilt game) Are you gonna catch hell from your other relatives if you go??? If you answer "yes" to one or more or (heaven forbid) ALL of these questions, then look into delaying your trip. The "price" you'll pay for going (and not enjoying yourself while you're there cuz of the guilt trip you'll be on) should be considered. If you answer "no" to these questions, and you can arrange for her to have the proper care when she comes out of the hospital, then GO. And have FUN.

08-31-2005	#7 (permalink)
MN Annie reposado Join Date: Oct 2004 Posts: 1,302	This happened to me and I went; Mom said to go. It was our very first trip to Mexico and my mother was diagnosed with breast cancer about ten days before we were to fly out. I was able to enjoy the trip and not worry (much). She came through with flying colors and is still very healthy at the age of 85. I had a hysterectomy several years ago. I didn't expect my children to their plans to watch me recuperate. Go and enjoy! By the time you get home, she will just be feeling good enough to welcome your visits.

08-31-2005	#8 (permalink)
sunnygrl añejo Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: southern US Posts: 1,541	Mike, I'm somewhat confused. Is it normal for someone to wait for 2 years to be operated on? Does she live in Canada or the US? Is she close by where you live? I've never heard of anyone in the US waiting 2 years for a surgery to be scheduled. Do you have other siblings that can care for her? Will your name be mud, with family members if you go? I, too have had a hysterectomy (late 40's) and though it was a piece of cake, there were things I could not and was not allowed to do. If something goes terribly wrong, you can always hop a plane to her side. Are you a schmuck? No. But, only you can decide if this is what's best and weigh all the factors. She'll probably have to stay in the hospital for 2 or 3 days, so by the time she gets out, your vacation will be almost over. My 2 cents dee

09-01-2005	#9 (permalink)
MikenJulie Guest Posts: n/a	The waiting game up here in Canada for surgery (at least in BC) is a long story, but yes it can be common in some cases. My mother was delayed so long due to her condition isn't as severe as others. If it was, it would of been done some time ago. I live in the same town as my parents, Julie's family is based here also. Mom and I talked last night, we will stick with our trip schedule. She has help for her lined up, my sister is living in Burnaby, BC, but she's prepared to fly up if needed also. My father had some serious surgery this year already, Julie's grandma suffered a stroke and is in the hospital currently, her brother has been in and out of the hospital due to drug related siezures, and I'm waiting for my scheduled shoulder surgery (torn upper ligament, no biggie, but it hurts like heck all the time). I guess I'm just a little bit "jumpy" when someone mentions hospital. I'd switch to decalf, but I don't drink coffee. I do feel better after the talk last night, I'll just phone to check up on her. Thanks for the feedback/support everyone, it was most appreciated.

09-01-2005	#11 (permalink)
Kellyk añejo Join Date: May 2005 Location: Dallas,TX Posts: 5,710	Glad you got it worked out and feel better now My dad says he's through with Dr's 'cuz everytime he goes they find something wrong Really interferres with his vacation plans!

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