Been In Playa Too Long?

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Signs that you might have been in Playa a little too long might be...

You lose arguments with inanimate objects.
You have to hold onto the lawn to keep from falling off the earth.
Thought of your job back home are interfering with your drinking.
Your doctor finds traces of blood in your alcohol stream.
The back of your head keeps getting hit by the toilet seat.
You sincerely believe alcohol to be the elusive 5th food group.
You feel 24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case - coincidence?? - I think not!
You say, "Two hands and just one mouth... - now THAT'S a drinking problem! "
You can focus better with one eye closed.
The parking lot seems to have moved while you were in the bar.
Your twin sons are named Barley and Hops.
Hey, 5 beers has just as many calories as a burger, screw dinner!
Mosquitoes catch a buzz after attacking you
At AA meetings you begin: "Hi, my name is... uh...?"
Your idea of cutting back is less salt on the rim of your margarita.
You wake up in the bedroom, your underwear is in the bathroom, but you fell asleep clothed - hmmm.
Everybody at The Beer Bucket says 'Hi' when you come in...