A Bad Cook?

[Bumper]

Signs You're a Bad Cook

1. You use the smoke alarm as akitchen timer.
2. You consider it a culinary success if the pop-tart stays in one piece.
3. Your dog goes to the neighbours' to eat.
4. Your family buys Rolaids and Kaopectate in bulk.
5. When you barbecue, two of your kids hold water guns and the third stands ready by the phone with 911 on speed-dial.
6. Your family automatically heads for the dinner table every time they hear a fire truck siren.
7. The EPA insists that all your garbage cans be marked with biohazard symbols.
8. Your microwave display reads "TILT!"
9. Your two best recipes are meatloaf and apple pie, but your dinner guests can't tell which is which.
10. Your pie filling bubbles over and eats the enamel off the bottom of the oven.
11. You've used three boxes of scouring pads and a bottle of Drano and a crowbar, and that macaroni and cheese still won't let go of the pan.
12. Pest control companies keep pestering you for your recipes.
13. You make tuna noodle surprise and the surprise is that it glows in the dark and melts the silverware.
14. Your kids know exactly what 'peas porridge in a pot nine days old' tastes like.
15. Your family prays before AND after they eat!

[timbit]

Originally Posted by Bumper

Signs You're a Bad Cook

1. You use the smoke alarm as akitchen timer.
2. You consider it a culinary success if the pop-tart stays in one piece.
3. Your dog goes to the neighbours' to eat.
4. Your family buys Rolaids and Kaopectate in bulk.
5. When you barbecue, two of your kids hold water guns and the third stands ready by the phone with 911 on speed-dial.
6. Your family automatically heads for the dinner table every time they hear a fire truck siren.
7. The EPA insists that all your garbage cans be marked with biohazard symbols.
8. Your microwave display reads "TILT!"
9. Your two best recipes are meatloaf and apple pie, but your dinner guests can't tell which is which.
10. Your pie filling bubbles over and eats the enamel off the bottom of the oven.
11. You've used three boxes of scouring pads and a bottle of Drano and a crowbar, and that macaroni and cheese still won't let go of the pan.
12. Pest control companies keep pestering you for your recipes.
13. You make tuna noodle surprise and the surprise is that it glows in the dark and melts the silverware.
14. Your kids know exactly what 'peas porridge in a pot nine days old' tastes like.
15. Your family prays before AND after they eat!

Hey Bumper--I resemble those comments
and my addition to your list-------
!6. Your adult children start gagging at the grocery store when they pass the hamburger helper display.