TR: raquelle261 & colleagues do Cuba

[raquelle261]

Anyone fancy a bit more?


Day 4 (Sun 22 May) Pt1.3 (day)
Back on board (again), we dry off in the blazing middle of the day sunshine as off we set again, this time headed for Cayo Blanco island – a popular lunch stop for the tourist excursions from the resort hotels in Varadero – where we are to have a lobster/chicken BBQ lunch. Approaching the …










The beach here is beautiful. And practically totally deserted:




The palapa roof is the first shade most of us have had all day so far, so sitting down for lunch under here is very welcome. Some of our party in fact are looking so red on parts of them they look like they have been being tortured! We in truth have possibly been giving ourselves sunstroke all morning, so relish the shade:

[raquelle261]

Everywhere and everything we eat in Cuba is and has been fantastic. However, this part of the trip is the only time I would criticise the food and it makes me very, very wary in future of anything being described as anything akin to a “beach BBQ” when in the Caribbean…. Most of the group opt for the lobster but at least a couple of us (i.e. myself and Haguey) go for the chicken. (I am going to live to seriously regret this decision like you won’t believe, but more of that later….) Lunch is brought to us ready plated up and is merely the meat/fish plonked on a plate with some fries. Very basic and nothing sophisticated in the slightest – red/brown sauce and mayonnaise bottles are on the table by way of accompaniment. We are starving hungry by now though so tuck in without giving it much thought. Then…….

BOOM!!!!


An almighty explosion! Literally sounds like a bomb going off! There are screams all round!!!! But the screams instantly turn into as we turn around to see Mark and Nick covered from head to toe in red sauce as a result of one of the plastic bottles exploding in the heat:






After doing a spot of “red sauce wrestling” those two take themselves off get cleaned off and have a hose down. After lunch, a few of us enjoy the short time we have on the beach and spend time basking in the warm waters – the water is so clear and so warm we have angel fish swimming in and out of our legs, (I still have that bloody Jaws theme tune in my head though, its getting like an OCD now and bugging the crap out of me) whilst a few others have a game of beach volleyball:








Wow. What well-honed and agile sportsmen……! <<ahem>> As the following 70 seconds of footage will tell you, the Olympic teams have nothing to fear. Our sporting prowess leaves a lot to be desired and we are seriously, seriously shite!!!

[Thor Henning]

What a beautiful place!

[4wheeled]

Originally Posted by raquelle261

Thanks Paul... and I hope I don't disappoint when it comes to doing the Playa one. Oh, and btw....if you want to actually hear my accent for real.... flick back through to the "stilt walkers" video clip when we are in Cathedal Square in Havana... the famous "walk in front of them, walk in front of them NOW" clip.....

ya, i noticed that when i first watched it too. bossy, in a good way so now i can read what you write and 'hear' you. i think i have a board crush.

not sure i wanna hear about the outcome of your chicken lunch though.

[Doggiemom]

Fantastic report!!! Finally getting caught up here......more, more more!

[Rissask]

very nice

any pictures of Varadero beach in front of the hotel?

In Holguin they have a similar setup for the dolphin swims from what I can gather. They are in a large, deep pen in the middle of a big bay. It is a lot better than having them in a tiny shallow tank on a noisy beach, for sure.

[raquelle261]

Originally Posted by Rissask

any pictures of Varadero beach in front of the hotel?

Yep..... coming up soon.....

[raquelle261]

Originally Posted by Doggiemom

......more, more more!

Here you go then........ Sorry in advance for lack of pics in the next piece of the story…. it is all captured on the feature-film-length DVD rather than in stills, so I apologise for there being no visuals… Oh…. And I am going to get these out of the way early:

[raquelle261]

Day 4 (Sun 22 May) Pt1.4 (day)
Back on board again, we wave bye-bye to Cayo Blanco. As we get out into open water again we are impressed and amazed at how strong a phone signal we are getting on our UK cellphones (we are not, technically, “on vacation” so a few of the guys are still, technically, “working”……. well…….. for all of about 10 mins a day). My mum thinks it is really cool that I phone her from the middle of the ocean to say hi to her! Nick is then heard to mutter a very valid and puzzling question…. “Why is it you can get a phone signal out here but you can’t get one on the bloody M1?” (which, aside from the M25, is probably the most important motorway in England, and is a very good point)

Our outward journey was quite a pace, as we travelled by the power of the cat’s engines. Our homeward leg was going to be much slower and more gentile as the captain switches off all engine power and unfurls the sails. <<sigh>> I lay stretched out at the front of the boat for a while, enjoying hearing the lapping of the ocean and the sound of the wind flapping the sail, all relaxed and lovely, also enjoying listening to the sing-song that has just started up at the back of the boat under the canopy….. Well, enjoying for a very short time……. jesus bloody shite, don’t they know the words to at least even one full verse of ANY song….???!!!!! They, in fact, seemingly don’t know the words to many songs at all, and even start singing our National Anthem as it is practically the only one they all know the words to.

Richard (the “man from Havana in his Buick” guy from the vid clip earlier in the report) however, fancies himself as being at one with his surroundings and keeps repeatedly starting them off on bursts of “La Bamba”. Now, I’m your real life “One Semester of Spanish” girl…. took Spanish at school….. and as part of our lessons we at one point had to learn the words to “La Bamba” (god knows why, but there you go, the UK education system for ya). “La, la, la, laaaaa, la bamba….” (instantly it grates on me as its not "la, la, la, laaaaa" its “para bailar”) keeps on coming. Again and again and again and again. Over and over and over. Again and again and again and again. Over and over and over. And, each time, the others join in too. And, each and every time, it fizzles out after a few renditions of that one and only line, because none of them know any more of the words. But we are in Cuba. We are in a latino country. A Spanish speaking country. Oh yes. So we have to get into the latin spirit. So again. And again. And again. And a-bloody-gain… “la, la, la, laaaaa, la bamba….”.

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaargh!!!!!!! It is enough to make you want to jump overboard…..

[raquelle261]

The next time Richard starts this line up again (which isn’t long, he is doing it disturbingly frequently), I decide enough is enough and if I can’t beat them, join them, and relocate myself to the back of the boat with them. Amazingly, they manage to stumble on one or two songs to which they seem to know, between them, it’s a group effort, most of the words. Freddie Mercury spins in his grave as they belt out “Bohemian Rhapsody”, including full-on air guitar and full theatrical interpretation (it had to be seen to be believed), followed by a somewhat drunken version of “We Are The Champions”. Frank Sinatra gets the treatment next, with accompanying slow-motion can-can dancing, as the strains of “New York New York” waft across the seas. The dancing provides much inspiration and leads them into “The Can Can”, with the two leg wagglers giving it even more gusto.

But I knew it wouldn’t last, and sure enough, dear old Richard starts us off again….. “La, la, la, laaaaaa, la bamba…..” Once again, everyone fizzles out pretty much there.

Now, normally, I wouldn’t probably do this, but they have fecked me off so much with this particular tune and now its like a stuck record that I need to exorcise from my head by at least once hearing it all the way through. I’ve heard this one line so many times I am developing a nervous twitch! So this time, when they fizzle out, I carry on and apart from the lone voice you can’t hear a pin drop as they stare at me….. “….. para bailar la bamba se necesita una poca de gracia, una poca de gracia pa mi pa ti, y arriba y arriba, ay arriba y arriba, por ti sere, por ti sere, por ti sere, bamba, bamba……”.

The captain momentarily veers us off course as he spins round while still holding the wheel, and my colleagues nearly faint, when I start with an actual verse….. “Yo no soy marinero, yo no soy marinero, soy capitan, soy capitan, soy capitan….. Bamba, bamba, bamba, bamba, bamba, bamba, bamba”. And so I continue, getting shot of my nervous twitch, and give them the whole of the song.

Aaaaaaaaaaaah, my twitch is going......

[raquelle261]

<<ahem>> Now, although they know I can be a bit of rottweiller at times when it comes to my job, at this point, as far as my personal life goes, they know me as generally being quite shy and unassuming. Which I am, for the most part. But what they do not know is that for a few years prior to this I have got up and sung occasionally, at karaoke (bagging myself a bit of money and a few freebie meals in competitions), from time to time when requested sung a few tunes at family celebrations or at a (previous) company do, and, because of my work commitments, have turned down a few offers of singing with a band. Above all else though, I am still fundamentally shy and unassuming and don’t feel that my singing voice is anything particularly special. I have obviously impressed them though, because they burst into a chant of “Rachael, Rachael, give us a song, Rachael, give us a song”.


They won’t let it drop, so unbelievably I find myself on a boat with its sails unfurled, in the middle of the ocean in the Caribbean, surrounded by bright blue sky and turquoise water, singing acapella….. I give them a rendition of Peggy Lee’s “Fever”. Kieran replies with the soccer chant “we’re not singing any more, we’re, not singing, any, more”. Nick asks the captain if he can bring the sail down and just let us bob around for a bit rather than rushing home. They ask me if I know any more and nag me to carry on. I give them a couple of old classics: “Big Spender” (Shirley Bassey) – camping it up and playing to one of them – then slowing it down again with “Mad About The Boy” (Dinah Washington). They still want more, so I bring it a little more up to date with “Never Ever” (All Saints) and “Killing Me Softly” (The Fugees). Its turning into a bit of a gig now….. they still want more and threaten to sling me overboard if I stop. So I round them off with a request of “Will You” (Hazel O’Connor) and then “Don’t Know Why” (Nora Jones), which I finish as we are pulling into the harbour back at Varadero.

Unfortunately it seems I have opened up a bit of a can of worms for myself here. Back on the coach we are reunited with Alexis, who has stayed ashore whilst we have been on our trip. Naya is busy telling him how a gringo sings La Bamba correctly all the way through and soon I have him pleading with me to sing it for him. God… as if I haven’t heard enough of this fecking song this afternoon……! He doesn’t know how many times I’ve heard the aborted versions though and as he looks so pleadingly at me I feel a bit mean saying no. Oh and “Rachael, Rachael, give us a song” has started up again from the drunken mob behind me. I am handed the tour guide microphone on the bus and am forced to give them an encore of “Mad About The Boy” and “La Bamba”, during which Dave and Sue have a boogie. Here are my appreciative audience:





It is around 4pm when we arrive back at the Paradisus and they finally set me free!!!!

[raquelle261]

Originally Posted by Rissask

In Holguin they have a similar setup for the dolphin swims from what I can gather. They are in a large, deep pen in the middle of a big bay. It is a lot better than having them in a tiny shallow tank on a noisy beach, for sure.

Do you know what.... I think you go to the same place from Holguin as we did from Varadero. A friend of mine went to Holguin a few weeks after we came back and they had a similar trip and it went to Cayo Blanco as we had. Don't have the chicken!!!

[Rissask]

Originally Posted by raquelle261

Do you know what.... I think you go to the same place from Holguin as we did from Varadero. A friend of mine went to Holguin a few weeks after we came back and they had a similar trip and it went to Cayo Blanco as we had. Don't have the chicken!!!

Wellllll , not unless you took about 8 or more hours to drive there!
Holguin is wayyyyy far from Varadero- almost the other end of the island! From what I can gather, there is a very similar catamaran trip, called 'Island Paradise' and they go to an island called Cayo Saetia. There is a pic of the location on the map here:

Cayo Saetia - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

It used to be a hunting reserve for visiting Soviet officials, and you can take another little tour and go see the zebras, ostriches and water buffalo they imported from Africa. Wild.

But I won't try the chicken (I'll be hungry though then- I hate that Caribbean clawless lobster!)

anyhoo...carry on!! Love the singing story....sounds like a blast.

[missixty]

That sauce bottle explodings so funny

Well done on the mini concert You should have charged!

[gingele]

Good show!!!!

Now, where's the vid?