Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: Winnipeg, Canada
The Saddest Story
Mercy Traleburn: You have tuned into 100.4 W.S.A.D., weíre giving away a prize for whoever has the saddest story that they would like to tell us.
Within the next five minutes the phone rings.
Mercy Traleburn: Hello, this is Mercy Traleburn, caller, whatís your name?
Christina Liel: My name is Christina Liel; Iím calling to tell you a story about my friend and me.
Mercy Traleburn: Okay Christina, just remember that you can win a new car and $10,000 if you tell us the saddest story.
Christina Liel: Well, nine months ago a friend named Jewl Smith and I decided to take a trip to Kiki Island to treat ourselves. Little did we know our lives would soon be in danger. The first two nights were fantastic until August-1-2006 at 3:06 a.m. We heard numerous people yelling and making a commotion in the hall. We opened the door to find people scattering frantically and no one was willing to tell us what was going on. So we turned on our television in our hotel suite and there was a flood warning. ďAll vacationers be prepared, scientists estimate in one hour, Kiki Island will flood do to storms heading our wayĒ said the forecaster. Thatís when Jewl and I also went into panic. We quickly packed all we can and headed towards the light house, we figured that on higher grounds, the flood couldnít reach us. Up there, were about ten to fifteen others crammed praying to the lord to guard their lives. So Jewl spotted a corner and we shoved our way through to make sure weíd get it. Sure enough, in one hour Kiki Island had flooded. All of us watched this beautiful island turn to rubble before our eyes. After 7 hours, around 10:30 a.m., I became hungry. Luckily three people packed food and were more than happy to share. Everyone got comfortable because we knew weíd be stranded for a while. By the next day, after 9:00 p.m., we all had run out of food supply. No one was worried until the next morning. Now, we were scared for our lives as our stomachs growled loudly. Everyone was already ticked off about no space, and no showers, but now we had to worry about food. The person who feared most was me. See, I am a diabetic. Jewl told me how I spaced out numerous times (I had blocked out after, so didnít remember).Finally, I said ď I canít take this anymoreĒ, I searched through the lighthouse drawers and cabinets, I felt as though an angel had landed on my shoulder when I caught a glimpse of honey. I quickly opened the jar then saddened again, the honey had gone bad. I, being an obese woman, never thought that one day Iíd be deprived of food. I then as told passed out again. I decided to eat the spoiled honey to save my life. Unfortunately it made me terribly sick. I vomited all throughout the day. My health was deteriorating as I knew it. So I ó!
Mercy Traleburn: Wait a sec. Christina, the honey went bad you say?
Christina Liel: Yes, making me terribly sick.
Mercy Traleburn: You must have felt really awful.
Christina Liel: I sure did.
Mercy Traleburn: You must have felt really awful that you had to lie to make a little money and get a new toy.
How did Mercy know Christina was lying?
EDIT: You may have noticed this thread was closed as soon as it was entered. That was not intended to limit your input or enjoyment in any way. On the contrary, your participation is most welcome. The action was taken to prevent eager Peeps from going into some search engine, finding the answer, and posting it, as happened on several occasions in the past. (Of course I harvest a lot of this material from other sources. You didnít think I create it all myself, did you? Iím good, but Iím not that good!) Regrettably, that also means that folks who legitimately work out their own answers, and would like to post them, donít get to display their prowess, but Iím afraid that canít be helped. Iíll open the thread in a couple of days, when Peeps have had an opportunity to try their hand at a solution, and you can post away then. The official answer will come a bit after that. I appreciate your patience and understanding, and hope you enjoy the exercise.
Life's journey is not to arrive at the grave safely in a pristine, well-preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, totally used up and worn out, shouting "Holy Shit...what a ride!!"