Kitty lovers unite (way off topic) - Page 5

**Bumper** · 06-22-2004

Quote:

Originally Posted by TAPPY

Maine Coons are such a sweet breed, did Phoof have the big double paws ???

My first cat was a Maine Coon and had them.....amazing to see !!!!

One of our guys is Maine Coon. Doesn't have the double paws, but the one's he has are big enough that he could easily waltz across a Winnipeg lawn in winter without snowshoes. He loves to climb up on my chest and do that "kneading" thing, with those size 12's, until I'm sufficiently tenderized, then he settles down for a nap.

Nerak936 · 06-22-2004

Awwwww, Bump. You're just a softy after all, eh??

Tappy: No, Phoof didn't have the double paws. My Eli has one double paw (which the doc says is unusual... but then again, Eli IS unusual!). He looks like he could play right field for the Red Sox.

TAPPY · 06-22-2004

Ahhhh Bump you got a nester !!!!!!!!

Those Maine Coons do have BIG feet !!!!

Terrie · 06-22-2004

I'm not so sure I understand the "double claws". My boys have huge hands with lots of hair coming out of their paws. We are not talking about Hemingway cats with additional toes. These guys just have really big feet with lots of hairy-furry stuff sticking out between the toes.
Both are very large and as stated, my "little one" is the one with the most laid back personality of any cat. He really doesn't give a sh__ and nothing normally bothers him. But, as stated earlier in this thread he had come to the end of his rope with Boston Blackie (our stocky stray with such a funny personality that it's hard to believe that anyone would put him out). Another bop on the head without warning and BB was put in his place. It's funny, however, with our other Maine Coon who is a breeded Silver, personalities are so different. Everyone is so afraid of him. I don't know why we have an alarm system. This guy loves us so much, but my girlfriend that sat for them actually took pictures. She said to him, "You love me when your mommy is home. Go ahead, do your stuff and she has some hellacious pics of him "doing his stuff". He hisses like crazy and has actually trapped Rottweiler owners in the bathroom. (He's harmless- no claws, but large teeth). As stated before, I really don't know why we have and alarm system unless it is to wake the cats. Their names are either Baby Bear Bubba; Diamond Jim Brady; and Boston Blackie; or Bob, Jim, and Tom. (Just for future reference)

Quote:

Originally Posted by TAPPY

Maine Coons are such a sweet breed, did Phoof have the big double paws ???

My first cat was a Maine Coon and had them.....amazing to see !!!!

Mave · 06-23-2004

Someone sent me this once upon a time. If you've ever had to medicate a cat, you can identify with it:

How to give a cat a pill:

1. Pick cat up and cradle it in the crook of your left arm as if holding a baby. Position right forefinger and thumb on either side of cat's mouth and gently apply pressure to cheeks while holding pill in right hand. As cat opens mouth pop pill into mouth. Allow cat to close mouth and swallow.

2. Retrieve pill from floor and cat from behind sofa. Cradle cat in left arm and repeat process.

3. Retrieve cat from bedroom, and throw soggy pill away.

4. Take new pill from foil wrap, cradle cat in left arm holding rear paws tightly with left hand. Force jaws open and push pill to back of mouth with right forefinger. Hold mouth shut for a count of ten.

5. Retrieve pill from goldfish bowl and cat from top of wardrobe. Call spouse from garden.

6. Kneel on floor with cat wedged firmly between knees, hold front and rear paws. Ignore low growls emitted by cat. Get spouse to hold head firmly with one hand while forcing wooden ruler into mouth. Drop pill down ruler and rub cat's throat vigorously.

7. Retrieve cat from curtain rail, get another pill from foil wrap. Make note to buy new ruler and repair curtains. Carefully sweep shattered ornaments from hearth and set to one side for gluing later.

8. Wrap cat in large towel and get spouse to lie on cat with head just visible from below armpit. Put pill in end of drinking straw, force mouth open with pencil and blow down drinking straw.

9. Check the label to make sure pill not harmful to humans, drink beer to take taste away. Apply band-aid to spouse's forearm and remove blood from carpet with cold water and soap.

10. Retrieve cat from neighbor's shed. Drink another beer then get another pill. Place cat in cupboard and close door onto neck to leave head showing. Force mouth open with dessert spoon. Flick pill down throat with elastic band.

11. Fetch screwdriver from garage and put door back on hinges. Drink large tumbler of whisky to take away pain. Apply cold compress to cheek and check records for date of last tetanus jab. Throw Tee shirt away and fetch new one from bedroom.

12. Ring fire brigade to retrieve the bloody cat from tree across the road. Apologize to neighbor who crashed into fence while swerving to avoid cat. Take last pill from foil-wrap.

13. Tie the little bastards front paws to rear paws with garden twine and bind tightly to leg of dining table, find heavy duty pruning gloves from shed, pry cat's mouth open with small spanner. Push pill into mouth followed by large piece of fillet steak. Hold head vertically and pour a pint of water down throat to wash pill down.

14. Get spouse to drive you to the emergency room, sit quietly while doctor stitches fingers and forearm and removes pill remnants from right eye. Call at furniture shop on way home to order new table. Arrange for RSPCA to collect cat and ring local pet shop to see if they have any hamsters.

Mave

Nerak936 · 06-23-2004

Mave:

Oh, my!! Do we kitty owners know how close to the truth that pill story comes!!! Thanks for the chuckle!

Seriously, I had to give a daily pill to my kitty, Gizmo, for over two years before I lost her to intestinal cancer (she had a glorious life with me for almost 15 years - I like to think now that she's spending her time curled up in my parents' laps). What I discovered to be the best way was to put the pill in a shot glass (sans tequila

), add a bit of water and give it a little while to dissolve, and then suck it up into an eye dropper. Then it was time to put Giz into her daily headlock, pry open her mouth quickly, and then **squirt** - deed done. She didn't have a chance to spit anything out, so it worked like a charm.

I use this same technique to get a tranquilizer into Tiggy before her vet appts. But even full of meds, the docs have to use those leather up-to-the-elbow gloves to handle her. She just totally freaks at the vets.

Poor thing! But on our most recent trips, she's decided to get back at me by peeing in the carrier. UGH

**Bumper** · 06-23-2004

Okay, now that we have some instructions on how to medicate your cat, it might be appropriate to consider how we might undertake giving your fur ball a bath. Take a look at the following.

Cat Bathing As A Martial Art

Some people say cats never have to be bathed. The claim cats lick themselves clean. They say cats have a special enzyme of some sort in their saliva that works like New, Improved Wisk - “dislodging the dirt where it hides, and whisking it away”

I’ve spent most of my life believing this folklore. Like most blind believers, I’ve been able to discount all the facts to the contrary - like the kitty odours that lurk in the corners of the garage and the dirt smudges that cling to the throw rug by the fireplace.

The time comes, however, when a person must face reality; when they must look squarely in the face of massive public sentiment to the contrary and announce, “This cat smells like a port-a-potty on a hot day in Juarez.”

When that day arrives at your house, as it has to mine, I have some advise you might want to consider as you place your feline friend under your arm and head for the bathtub. Remember now, this is not the dumb dog who can be led to the tub with lies and a trail of Kibbles and Bits.

Know that although the cat has the advantage of quickness and a total lack of regard for human life, you have the advantage of strength. Capitalize on that advantage by selecting the battlefield. Don’t try to bathe him in an area where he can force you to chase him. Pick a very small bathroom. If your bathroom is more than four feet square, I recommend you get in the tub with the cat and close the sliding glass doors as if you were about to take a shower. (A simple shower curtain will not do. A berserk cat can shred a three-ply rubber or plastic shower curtain faster than a politician can change sides)

Know that a cat has claws and will not hesitate to remove all the skin from your body. Your advantage here is that you are smart and know how to dress to protect yourself. I recommend canvas overalls tucked into high-topped, steel-toed construction boots, a pair of steel-mesh gloves, an army helmet, a hockey face mask, and a long-sleeve flak jacket.

Prepare everything in advance. There is no time to go out for a towel when you have a cat tearing a hole in your flak jacket. Draw the water, making it a little warmer than is needed, as you still have to find the cat. Make sure the bottle of kitty shampoo is inside the glass enclosure. Make sure the towel is within reach, even if you are lying on your back in the water. Blow drying the cat is not an option.

Find your cat. Use the element of surprise. Pick up your cat nonchalantly, as if your intention is to simply carry him/her to the supper dish. (Cats will not normally notice your strange attire. As a rule, they have little or no interest in fashion. If he does notice your garb, calmly explain that you are taking part in a product-testing experiment for J.C. Penney)

Once you are inside the bathroom, speed is essential to survival. In a single fluid motion, quickly shut the bathroom door, step into the tub enclosure, slide the glass door shut, dip the cat in the water, and squirt him with shampoo. You have begun one of the wildest 45 seconds of your life. Cats have no handles. Add the fact that he is now covered with soapy fur, and you’ve radically compounded the problem. Do not expect to hold on to him for more than two or three seconds at a time. When you do have some sort of grip on him, however, you must remember to give him another squirt of shampoo and rub like crazy. He’ll then spring free and fall back into the water, thereby rinsing himself. (The national record for cat lathering is three times, so don’t expect too much)

Next, the cat must be dried. Novice cat bathers always assume this part of the process will be the most difficult, for humans are generally worn out by this point and the cat is just getting determined. In fact, the drying is simple, when compared to what you’ve just been through. That’s because by now the cat is semi-permanently attached to your right leg. You simply pop the drain plug with your foot, reach for your towel, and wait. (Occasionally, however, the cat will end up clinging to the top of your army helmet. If this happens, the best thing you can do is shake him loose, and encourage him towards your leg) After all the water has drained from the tub, it is a simple matter to just reach down and dry the cat anchored to your body.

In a few days, the cat will relax enough to be removed from your leg. He will usually have nothing to do with you for about three weeks, and will spend a lot of time with his back turned to you. He may even become psychoceramic and develop the fixed stare of a porcelain figurine.

You will be tempted to think he is angry. This isn’t generally the case. As a rule, he is simply plotting ways to get through your defenses and do you permanent disfiguring damage the next time you decide to give him a bath. But at least now he smells a lot better.

Nerak936 · 06-23-2004

Good one, Mr. Bump!!!!!

Nerak936 · 06-25-2004

A few quotes from my cat-a-day desk calendar at the office:

"Never belittle the comfort offered by a cat -- she has no words, but by small touchings and buttings and leanings, she shows her love for you -- and tries to distract you from your sorrow." PAM BROWN

"Dogs eat. Cats dine." ANN TAYLOR

"Cats can work out mathematically the exact place to sit that will cause the most inconvenience." PAM BROWN

Yes, it's almost 5 PM on a Friday afternoon, and I'm bored.

**tommy** · 06-25-2004

Bumper...Just to let you know Little Kittie got in the fireplace while Donna was out shopping and she is covered in black sut and orange rusty color...Donna wont give her a bath after reading your post....Poor thing is running around looking like a mess...And she is White...

Nerak936 · 06-25-2004

Quote:

Originally Posted by sun seekers

Bumper...Just to let you know Little Kittie got in the fireplace while Donna was out shopping and she is covered in black sut and orange rusty color...Donna wont give her a bath after reading your post....Poor thing is running around looking like a mess...And she is White...

Sorry, Tommy. Didn't mean to laugh, but I couldn't help myself!!

Give Kitty some time. It's remarkable how cats can transform themselves back to "good as new". My folks' cat used to some in looking like hell after lounging in the garden dirt for the day (and digging up my mom's flowers at times too!), and within a couple of hours, he'd be bright as a new penny. He was a long-haired, basically white 'coon cat, so he had a LOT of work to do!

TAPPY · 06-25-2004

Cats are "self cleaning" that is why they make such great pets !!!! :p

But then they go and cough up a nice big furball for you to pick up !!!

Terrie · 06-26-2004

Hairballs are easier to clean up than trying to bathe kitty!!!

OMG!!!

**Bumper** · 06-26-2004

And just when you thought there couldn't be any more. I got cat stuff up the wazoo.

Cats In Physics

Law of Cat Inertia - A cat at rest will tend to remain at rest, unless acted upon by some outside force, such as the opening of a cat food can, or a nearby scurrying mouse.

Law of Cat Motion - A cat will move in a straight line, unless there is a really good reason to change direction.

Law of Cat Magnetism - All blue blazers and black sweaters attract cat hair in direct proportion to the darkness of the fabric.

Law of Cat Thermodynamics - Heat flows from a warmer to a cooler body, except in the case of a cat, in which case all heat flows to the cat.

Law of Cat Stretching - A cat will stretch to a distance proportional to the length of the nap just completed.

Law of Cat Sleeping - All cats must sleep with people whenever possible, in a position as uncomfortable for the people involved as is possible for the cat to inflict on them.

Law of Cat Elongation - A cat may make its body long enough to reach just about any counter top that has anything remotely interesting on it.

Law of Cat Acceleration - A cat will accelerate at a constant rate, until it gets good and ready to stop.

Law of Dinner Table Attendance - Cats must attend all meals where something good is being served.

Law of Rug Configuration - No rug may remain in its naturally flat state for very long.

Law of Obedience Resistance - A cat’s resistance varies in direct proportion to a human’s desire for it to do something.

Law of Energy Conservation - Cats know that energy can neither be created nor destroyed and will, therefore, use as little energy as possible.

Second Law of Energy Conservation - Cats also know that energy can only be stored by a lot of napping.

Law of Refrigerator Observation - Cats are aware that if they watch a refrigerator long enough, someone will come along and take out something good to eat.

Law of Electric Blanket Attraction - Turn on an electric blanket and a cat will be into bed at the speed of light.

Law of Random Comfort Seeking - A cat will always seek, and usually take over, the most comfortable spot in any given room.

Law of Cat Embarrassment - A cat’s irritation increases in direct proportion to its embarrassment, multiplied by the amount of human laughter.

Law of Bag / Box Occupancy - All bags and boxes in a given room must contain a cat within the first possible nanosecond.

Law of Milk Consumption - A cat will drink its weight in milk...squared, just to show you it can.

Law of Furniture Replacement - A cat’s instinctive need to scratch furniture is directly proportional to the cost of the furniture.

Law of Cat Landing - A cat will invariably land in the softest place possible.

Law of Fluid Displacement - A cat immersed in milk will displace its own volume, minus the amount of milk consumed.

Law of Cat Disinterest - A cat’s interest level will vary in inverse proportion to the amount of effort a human expends in trying to capture its interest.

Law of Pill Rejection - Any pill administered to a cat has the potential to attain escape velocity from the Earth’s gravitational field.

Law of Cat Composition - A cat is composed of Matter + Anti-Matter + It Doesn’t Matter.

Critter · 06-26-2004

Are you like that guy in the commercial that had cash up the wazoo and didn't need insurance? Except you have cats up the wazzo?

And if you do, are they coughed up like a hairball?

06-23-2004	#65 (permalink)
Mave beachaholic Join Date: Aug 2003 Location: Iowa Posts: 431	How to give a cat a pill Someone sent me this once upon a time. If you've ever had to medicate a cat, you can identify with it: How to give a cat a pill: 1. Pick cat up and cradle it in the crook of your left arm as if holding a baby. Position right forefinger and thumb on either side of cat's mouth and gently apply pressure to cheeks while holding pill in right hand. As cat opens mouth pop pill into mouth. Allow cat to close mouth and swallow. 2. Retrieve pill from floor and cat from behind sofa. Cradle cat in left arm and repeat process. 3. Retrieve cat from bedroom, and throw soggy pill away. 4. Take new pill from foil wrap, cradle cat in left arm holding rear paws tightly with left hand. Force jaws open and push pill to back of mouth with right forefinger. Hold mouth shut for a count of ten. 5. Retrieve pill from goldfish bowl and cat from top of wardrobe. Call spouse from garden. 6. Kneel on floor with cat wedged firmly between knees, hold front and rear paws. Ignore low growls emitted by cat. Get spouse to hold head firmly with one hand while forcing wooden ruler into mouth. Drop pill down ruler and rub cat's throat vigorously. 7. Retrieve cat from curtain rail, get another pill from foil wrap. Make note to buy new ruler and repair curtains. Carefully sweep shattered ornaments from hearth and set to one side for gluing later. 8. Wrap cat in large towel and get spouse to lie on cat with head just visible from below armpit. Put pill in end of drinking straw, force mouth open with pencil and blow down drinking straw. 9. Check the label to make sure pill not harmful to humans, drink beer to take taste away. Apply band-aid to spouse's forearm and remove blood from carpet with cold water and soap. 10. Retrieve cat from neighbor's shed. Drink another beer then get another pill. Place cat in cupboard and close door onto neck to leave head showing. Force mouth open with dessert spoon. Flick pill down throat with elastic band. 11. Fetch screwdriver from garage and put door back on hinges. Drink large tumbler of whisky to take away pain. Apply cold compress to cheek and check records for date of last tetanus jab. Throw Tee shirt away and fetch new one from bedroom. 12. Ring fire brigade to retrieve the bloody cat from tree across the road. Apologize to neighbor who crashed into fence while swerving to avoid cat. Take last pill from foil-wrap. 13. Tie the little bastards front paws to rear paws with garden twine and bind tightly to leg of dining table, find heavy duty pruning gloves from shed, pry cat's mouth open with small spanner. Push pill into mouth followed by large piece of fillet steak. Hold head vertically and pour a pint of water down throat to wash pill down. 14. Get spouse to drive you to the emergency room, sit quietly while doctor stitches fingers and forearm and removes pill remnants from right eye. Call at furniture shop on way home to order new table. Arrange for RSPCA to collect cat and ring local pet shop to see if they have any hamsters. Mave

06-23-2004	#66 (permalink)
Nerak936 Crazy Cat Lady =^.''.^= Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Southeastern Massachusetts Posts: 18,323	Mave: Oh, my!! Do we kitty owners know how close to the truth that pill story comes!!! Thanks for the chuckle! Seriously, I had to give a daily pill to my kitty, Gizmo, for over two years before I lost her to intestinal cancer (she had a glorious life with me for almost 15 years - I like to think now that she's spending her time curled up in my parents' laps). What I discovered to be the best way was to put the pill in a shot glass (sans tequila ), add a bit of water and give it a little while to dissolve, and then suck it up into an eye dropper. Then it was time to put Giz into her daily headlock, pry open her mouth quickly, and then squirt - deed done. She didn't have a chance to spit anything out, so it worked like a charm. I use this same technique to get a tranquilizer into Tiggy before her vet appts. But even full of meds, the docs have to use those leather up-to-the-elbow gloves to handle her. She just totally freaks at the vets. Poor thing! But on our most recent trips, she's decided to get back at me by peeing in the carrier. UGH Last edited by Nerak936 : 06-23-2004 at 06:38 AM.

06-23-2004	#67 (permalink)
Bumper Class Clown Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: Winnipeg, Canada Posts: 9,213	Okay, now that we have some instructions on how to medicate your cat, it might be appropriate to consider how we might undertake giving your fur ball a bath. Take a look at the following. Cat Bathing As A Martial Art Some people say cats never have to be bathed. The claim cats lick themselves clean. They say cats have a special enzyme of some sort in their saliva that works like New, Improved Wisk - “dislodging the dirt where it hides, and whisking it away” I’ve spent most of my life believing this folklore. Like most blind believers, I’ve been able to discount all the facts to the contrary - like the kitty odours that lurk in the corners of the garage and the dirt smudges that cling to the throw rug by the fireplace. The time comes, however, when a person must face reality; when they must look squarely in the face of massive public sentiment to the contrary and announce, “This cat smells like a port-a-potty on a hot day in Juarez.” When that day arrives at your house, as it has to mine, I have some advise you might want to consider as you place your feline friend under your arm and head for the bathtub. Remember now, this is not the dumb dog who can be led to the tub with lies and a trail of Kibbles and Bits. Know that although the cat has the advantage of quickness and a total lack of regard for human life, you have the advantage of strength. Capitalize on that advantage by selecting the battlefield. Don’t try to bathe him in an area where he can force you to chase him. Pick a very small bathroom. If your bathroom is more than four feet square, I recommend you get in the tub with the cat and close the sliding glass doors as if you were about to take a shower. (A simple shower curtain will not do. A berserk cat can shred a three-ply rubber or plastic shower curtain faster than a politician can change sides) Know that a cat has claws and will not hesitate to remove all the skin from your body. Your advantage here is that you are smart and know how to dress to protect yourself. I recommend canvas overalls tucked into high-topped, steel-toed construction boots, a pair of steel-mesh gloves, an army helmet, a hockey face mask, and a long-sleeve flak jacket. Prepare everything in advance. There is no time to go out for a towel when you have a cat tearing a hole in your flak jacket. Draw the water, making it a little warmer than is needed, as you still have to find the cat. Make sure the bottle of kitty shampoo is inside the glass enclosure. Make sure the towel is within reach, even if you are lying on your back in the water. Blow drying the cat is not an option. Find your cat. Use the element of surprise. Pick up your cat nonchalantly, as if your intention is to simply carry him/her to the supper dish. (Cats will not normally notice your strange attire. As a rule, they have little or no interest in fashion. If he does notice your garb, calmly explain that you are taking part in a product-testing experiment for J.C. Penney) Once you are inside the bathroom, speed is essential to survival. In a single fluid motion, quickly shut the bathroom door, step into the tub enclosure, slide the glass door shut, dip the cat in the water, and squirt him with shampoo. You have begun one of the wildest 45 seconds of your life. Cats have no handles. Add the fact that he is now covered with soapy fur, and you’ve radically compounded the problem. Do not expect to hold on to him for more than two or three seconds at a time. When you do have some sort of grip on him, however, you must remember to give him another squirt of shampoo and rub like crazy. He’ll then spring free and fall back into the water, thereby rinsing himself. (The national record for cat lathering is three times, so don’t expect too much) Next, the cat must be dried. Novice cat bathers always assume this part of the process will be the most difficult, for humans are generally worn out by this point and the cat is just getting determined. In fact, the drying is simple, when compared to what you’ve just been through. That’s because by now the cat is semi-permanently attached to your right leg. You simply pop the drain plug with your foot, reach for your towel, and wait. (Occasionally, however, the cat will end up clinging to the top of your army helmet. If this happens, the best thing you can do is shake him loose, and encourage him towards your leg) After all the water has drained from the tub, it is a simple matter to just reach down and dry the cat anchored to your body. In a few days, the cat will relax enough to be removed from your leg. He will usually have nothing to do with you for about three weeks, and will spend a lot of time with his back turned to you. He may even become psychoceramic and develop the fixed stare of a porcelain figurine. You will be tempted to think he is angry. This isn’t generally the case. As a rule, he is simply plotting ways to get through your defenses and do you permanent disfiguring damage the next time you decide to give him a bath. But at least now he smells a lot better. __________________ Life's journey is not to arrive at the grave safely in a pristine, well-preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, totally used up and worn out, shouting "Holy Shit...what a ride!!"

06-25-2004	#69 (permalink)
Nerak936 Crazy Cat Lady =^.''.^= Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Southeastern Massachusetts Posts: 18,323	Cat Quotes A few quotes from my cat-a-day desk calendar at the office: "Never belittle the comfort offered by a cat -- she has no words, but by small touchings and buttings and leanings, she shows her love for you -- and tries to distract you from your sorrow." PAM BROWN "Dogs eat. Cats dine." ANN TAYLOR "Cats can work out mathematically the exact place to sit that will cause the most inconvenience." PAM BROWN Yes, it's almost 5 PM on a Friday afternoon, and I'm bored.

Thread Tools	Search this Thread
Show Printable Version Email this Page	Search this Thread: Advanced Search
Rate This Thread
Rate This Thread:

06-22-2004	#62 (permalink)
Nerak936 Crazy Cat Lady =^.''.^= Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Southeastern Massachusetts Posts: 18,323	Awwwww, Bump. You're just a softy after all, eh?? Tappy: No, Phoof didn't have the double paws. My Eli has one double paw (which the doc says is unusual... but then again, Eli IS unusual!). He looks like he could play right field for the Red Sox.

06-22-2004	#63 (permalink)
TAPPY Weeziana peep Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: Louisiana Posts: 14,668	Ahhhh Bump you got a nester !!!!!!!! Those Maine Coons do have BIG feet !!!!

06-23-2004	#68 (permalink)
Nerak936 Crazy Cat Lady =^.''.^= Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Southeastern Massachusetts Posts: 18,323	Good one, Mr. Bump!!!!!

06-25-2004	#70 (permalink)
tommy Moderator Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: Tx Posts: 12,013	Bumper...Just to let you know Little Kittie got in the fireplace while Donna was out shopping and she is covered in black sut and orange rusty color...Donna wont give her a bath after reading your post....Poor thing is running around looking like a mess...And she is White...

06-25-2004	#72 (permalink)
TAPPY Weeziana peep Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: Louisiana Posts: 14,668	Cats are "self cleaning" that is why they make such great pets !!!! :p But then they go and cough up a nice big furball for you to pick up !!!

06-26-2004	#73 (permalink)
Terrie toe in water Join Date: Oct 2003 Location: Dayton, OH Posts: 57	Hairballs are easier to clean up than trying to bathe kitty!!! OMG!!!

06-26-2004	#74 (permalink)
Bumper Class Clown Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: Winnipeg, Canada Posts: 9,213	And just when you thought there couldn't be any more. I got cat stuff up the wazoo. Cats In Physics Law of Cat Inertia - A cat at rest will tend to remain at rest, unless acted upon by some outside force, such as the opening of a cat food can, or a nearby scurrying mouse. Law of Cat Motion - A cat will move in a straight line, unless there is a really good reason to change direction. Law of Cat Magnetism - All blue blazers and black sweaters attract cat hair in direct proportion to the darkness of the fabric. Law of Cat Thermodynamics - Heat flows from a warmer to a cooler body, except in the case of a cat, in which case all heat flows to the cat. Law of Cat Stretching - A cat will stretch to a distance proportional to the length of the nap just completed. Law of Cat Sleeping - All cats must sleep with people whenever possible, in a position as uncomfortable for the people involved as is possible for the cat to inflict on them. Law of Cat Elongation - A cat may make its body long enough to reach just about any counter top that has anything remotely interesting on it. Law of Cat Acceleration - A cat will accelerate at a constant rate, until it gets good and ready to stop. Law of Dinner Table Attendance - Cats must attend all meals where something good is being served. Law of Rug Configuration - No rug may remain in its naturally flat state for very long. Law of Obedience Resistance - A cat’s resistance varies in direct proportion to a human’s desire for it to do something. Law of Energy Conservation - Cats know that energy can neither be created nor destroyed and will, therefore, use as little energy as possible. Second Law of Energy Conservation - Cats also know that energy can only be stored by a lot of napping. Law of Refrigerator Observation - Cats are aware that if they watch a refrigerator long enough, someone will come along and take out something good to eat. Law of Electric Blanket Attraction - Turn on an electric blanket and a cat will be into bed at the speed of light. Law of Random Comfort Seeking - A cat will always seek, and usually take over, the most comfortable spot in any given room. Law of Cat Embarrassment - A cat’s irritation increases in direct proportion to its embarrassment, multiplied by the amount of human laughter. Law of Bag / Box Occupancy - All bags and boxes in a given room must contain a cat within the first possible nanosecond. Law of Milk Consumption - A cat will drink its weight in milk...squared, just to show you it can. Law of Furniture Replacement - A cat’s instinctive need to scratch furniture is directly proportional to the cost of the furniture. Law of Cat Landing - A cat will invariably land in the softest place possible. Law of Fluid Displacement - A cat immersed in milk will displace its own volume, minus the amount of milk consumed. Law of Cat Disinterest - A cat’s interest level will vary in inverse proportion to the amount of effort a human expends in trying to capture its interest. Law of Pill Rejection - Any pill administered to a cat has the potential to attain escape velocity from the Earth’s gravitational field. Law of Cat Composition - A cat is composed of Matter + Anti-Matter + It Doesn’t Matter.

06-26-2004	#75 (permalink)
Critter añejo Join Date: Aug 2002 Location: Cerca de Washington DC Posts: 3,343	Are you like that guy in the commercial that had cash up the wazoo and didn't need insurance? Except you have cats up the wazzo? And if you do, are they coughed up like a hairball?

register to remove these adverts