FORUM FUN FEATURE!! Beethoven's Ninth?

[Bumper]

Several years ago, the Los Angeles Philharmonic Orchestra was scheduled to perform Beethoven’s Ninth Symphony, under the direction of Zubha Mehta. At the last moment, Mehta became ill and it was necessary to find a substitute conductor. The concert’s producer was able to convince Professor Theodore Badder, from the U.C.L.A. Classical Musical Department, an expert on Beethoven’s symphonies and a noted conductor in his own right, to pitch-hit.

The Fourth Movement of Beethoven’s Chorale Symphony, as it is better known, is unusual in several ways. First, it uses not only a chorus, but several soloists as instruments during the famous “Ode To Joy” in the Fourth Movement. Second, the bass players hate playing Beethoven’s Ninth. There’s a lengthy segment in this movement where the bass viols don’t have a thing to do...not a single note for page after page. This section of the orchestra had decided that during this performance, after the bass players had played their segment in the opening of the last movement, that they were to quietly lay down their instruments and leave the stage, rather than sit on their stools looking and feeling dumb for over twenty minutes. Well, once they got back stage, someone suggested they have a few brews. They had quickly downed the first couple of rounds when one said, “Shouldn’t we be getting back to our seats? It’d be awfully embarrassing if we were late.” Another musician (presumably the one who had suggested drinking in the first place) replied, “Oh, I anticipated that we might like a little more time, so I tied a string around the pages of the conductor’s score. Badder will have to slow the tempo way down while he waves his baton with one hand and fumbles with the string with the other. We’ll be able to hear the change and make it back to our seats in plenty of time.” Satisfied with the scheme, they settled back to enjoy a few more beers. When they heard the anticipated change in pace of the music, they made it back to their chairs just in time. They were all a little tipsy by this point and one look at the conductor’s face told them they were in serious trouble. Just when you’d think it was about as bad as it could get, both the first and second viols passed out right in their chairs! Badder was furious and on the verge of losing it completely, as he began making gestures at the offending musicians while trying to finish the selection while flipping the tied pages of his music. After all...

It was the last of the Ninth, the Badder was a pinch-hitter, the score was tied, the basses were loaded, and two men were out.

[Nerak936]

After how the Red Sox did against the Yankees this week, reading that story hurt, Bump. It just plain hurt!