FORUM FUN FEATURE!! Saturday Night Semi-Live

**Bumper** · 08-28-2004

For those of us with NO LIFE, ie; those socially-challenged forum folk facing a Saturday evening with absolutely nothing planned, perhaps this will help you fill a small portion of those empty hours.

INSTRUCTIONS: Read each question carefully. Answer all questions.
Time Limit - 4 hours, begin immediately

HISTORY: Describe the history of the papacy from its origins to the present day, concentrating especially, but not exclusively, on its social, political, economic, religious, and philosophical impact on Europe, Asia, America, and Africa. Be brief, concise, and specific.

MEDICINE: You have been provided with a razor blade, a piece of gauze, and a bottle of Scotch. Remove your appendix. Do not suture until your work has been inspected. You have fifteen minutes.

COMMUNICATION SKILLS: 2500 rioting, narcotic-crazed aborigines are storming the classroom. Calm them. You may use any ancient language except Latin or Greek.

BIOLOGY: Create life. Estimate the difference on subsequent human cultures if this form of life had been developed 500 million years earlier, with special attention to its probable effect on the English parliamentary system. Prove your thesis.

MUSIC: Write a piano concerto. Orchestrate and perform it with flute and drum. You will find a piano under your seat.

PSYCHOLOGY: Based on your knowledge of their works, evaluate the emotional stability, degree of social adjustment, and repressed frustrations of each of the following: Alexander of Aphrodisias, Rameses II, Gregory of Nicea, and Hammurabi. Support your evaluations with quotations from each man’s works, making appropriate references. It is not necessary to translate.

SOCIOLOGY: Estimate the sociological problems which might accompany the end of the world. Construct an experiment to test your theory.

ENGINEERING: The disassembled components of a high-powered rifle have been placed on your desk. You will also find an instruction manual printed in Swahili and Ojibway. In ten minutes, a hungry Bengal tiger will be released into the room. Take whatever action you consider appropriate. Be prepared to justify your decision.

ECONOMICS: Develop a realistic plan for restructuring Albania’s national debt. Trace the possible negative effects of your plan in the following areas: Cubism, Berlinni’s principle, and Einstein’s theory of relativity. Outline a method for preventing these effects. Criticize this method from all possible points of view. Point out the deficiencies in your approach.

POLITICAL SCIENCE: There is a red telephone on the desk beside you. Start World War III. Report at length on its socio-political effects, if any.

EPISTEMOLOGY: Take a position for or against truth. Prove the validity of your stand.

PHYSICS: Explain the nature of matter. In your answer, include an evaluation of the impact of the development of mathematics on science.

PHILOSOPHY: Sketch the development of human thought. Estimate its significance. Compare with the development of any other kind of thought.

MANAGEMENT SCIENCE: Define management. Define science. How do they relate? Why? Create a generalized algorithm that can be used to optimize all managerial decisions. Design the systems interface, and prepare all software necessary, to program this algorithm on whatever data platform may be selected by the examiner.

GENERAL KNOWLEDGE: Describe everything you know in detail. Be objective and specific.

EXTRA CREDIT: Define the universe. Give three examples.

Critter · 08-28-2004

Definitely "B" for all of the above.

**sctx** · 08-28-2004

" b "

DavidB · 08-28-2004

I'll go with True, true, false, all of the above..(repeat)

TAPPY · 08-28-2004

All of the above !!!

mckinzie · 08-28-2004

Quote:

Originally Posted by sctx

" b "

Your avatar just made me spew orange juice all over the place

Nerak936 · 08-29-2004

I bet Cuffed could do this little exercise in about 10 minutes FLAT. And have time left over to comment on your sentence structure, Bump.

**Bumper** · 08-29-2004

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nerak936

I bet Cuffed could do this little exercise in about 10 minutes FLAT. And have time left over to comment on your sentence structure, Bump.

Ah yes, Karen, quite likely, but Cuff is safely ensconsed in Playa at the present time, and conspicuous by his absence. Timing is everything! I didn't just fall off the turnip truck, y'know.

Nerak936 · 08-29-2004

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bumper

Ah yes, Karen, quite likely, but Cuff is safely ensconsed in Playa at the present time, and conspicuous by his absence. Timing is everything! I didn't just fall off the turnip truck, y'know.

Bump, I might think to accuse you of several things, but being dumb sure ain't one of 'em!!!

08-28-2004	#1 (permalink)
Bumper Class Clown Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: Winnipeg, Canada Posts: 9,105	FORUM FUN FEATURE!! Saturday Night Semi-Live For those of us with NO LIFE, ie; those socially-challenged forum folk facing a Saturday evening with absolutely nothing planned, perhaps this will help you fill a small portion of those empty hours. INSTRUCTIONS: Read each question carefully. Answer all questions. Time Limit - 4 hours, begin immediately HISTORY: Describe the history of the papacy from its origins to the present day, concentrating especially, but not exclusively, on its social, political, economic, religious, and philosophical impact on Europe, Asia, America, and Africa. Be brief, concise, and specific. MEDICINE: You have been provided with a razor blade, a piece of gauze, and a bottle of Scotch. Remove your appendix. Do not suture until your work has been inspected. You have fifteen minutes. COMMUNICATION SKILLS: 2500 rioting, narcotic-crazed aborigines are storming the classroom. Calm them. You may use any ancient language except Latin or Greek. BIOLOGY: Create life. Estimate the difference on subsequent human cultures if this form of life had been developed 500 million years earlier, with special attention to its probable effect on the English parliamentary system. Prove your thesis. MUSIC: Write a piano concerto. Orchestrate and perform it with flute and drum. You will find a piano under your seat. PSYCHOLOGY: Based on your knowledge of their works, evaluate the emotional stability, degree of social adjustment, and repressed frustrations of each of the following: Alexander of Aphrodisias, Rameses II, Gregory of Nicea, and Hammurabi. Support your evaluations with quotations from each man’s works, making appropriate references. It is not necessary to translate. SOCIOLOGY: Estimate the sociological problems which might accompany the end of the world. Construct an experiment to test your theory. ENGINEERING: The disassembled components of a high-powered rifle have been placed on your desk. You will also find an instruction manual printed in Swahili and Ojibway. In ten minutes, a hungry Bengal tiger will be released into the room. Take whatever action you consider appropriate. Be prepared to justify your decision. ECONOMICS: Develop a realistic plan for restructuring Albania’s national debt. Trace the possible negative effects of your plan in the following areas: Cubism, Berlinni’s principle, and Einstein’s theory of relativity. Outline a method for preventing these effects. Criticize this method from all possible points of view. Point out the deficiencies in your approach. POLITICAL SCIENCE: There is a red telephone on the desk beside you. Start World War III. Report at length on its socio-political effects, if any. EPISTEMOLOGY: Take a position for or against truth. Prove the validity of your stand. PHYSICS: Explain the nature of matter. In your answer, include an evaluation of the impact of the development of mathematics on science. PHILOSOPHY: Sketch the development of human thought. Estimate its significance. Compare with the development of any other kind of thought. MANAGEMENT SCIENCE: Define management. Define science. How do they relate? Why? Create a generalized algorithm that can be used to optimize all managerial decisions. Design the systems interface, and prepare all software necessary, to program this algorithm on whatever data platform may be selected by the examiner. GENERAL KNOWLEDGE: Describe everything you know in detail. Be objective and specific. EXTRA CREDIT: Define the universe. Give three examples. __________________ Life's journey is not to arrive at the grave safely in a pristine, well-preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, totally used up and worn out, shouting "Holy Shit...what a ride!!"

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08-28-2004	#2 (permalink)
Critter añejo Join Date: Aug 2002 Location: Cerca de Washington DC Posts: 3,343	Definitely "B" for all of the above.

08-28-2004	#3 (permalink)
sctx Fan of confusion Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Body in San Marcos Tx....Tankah in my mind Posts: 26,044	" b "

08-28-2004	#4 (permalink)
DavidB añejo Join Date: Oct 2003 Location: Mid Mich Posts: 2,755	I'll go with True, true, false, all of the above..(repeat)

08-28-2004	#5 (permalink)
TAPPY Weeziana peep Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: Louisiana Posts: 14,621	All of the above !!!

08-29-2004	#7 (permalink)
Nerak936 Crazy Cat Lady =^.''.^= Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Southeastern Massachusetts Posts: 18,300	I bet Cuffed could do this little exercise in about 10 minutes FLAT. And have time left over to comment on your sentence structure, Bump.

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