FORUM FUN FEATURE!! Things to say to a pregnant wife

[Bumper]

I wonder if an administrator of our acquaintance has had the unfortunate experience of letting one of these slip out? Probably not, since he's still posting.


Fatal Things To Say To Your Pregnant Wife

“Not to imply anything, but I don’t think the kid weighs forty pounds.”
“Y’know, looking at her, You’d never guess that Pamela Anderson had a baby.”
“I sure hope your thighs aren’t going to stay that flabby forever.”
“Well, couldn’t they induce labour? The 25th is the Grey Cup.”
“You’re about five pounds from getting a house call from Richard Simmons.”
“Fred at the office passed a kidney stone about the size of a pea. Boy, that’s gotta hurt.”
“Are your ankles supposed to look like that?”
“Get your own ice cream, Buddha!”
“Jeeez, you’re lookin’ awfully puffy today.”
“Got milk?”
“Maybe we should name the baby after my secretary, Tawney.”
“Man! That rose tattoo on your hip is the size of Madagascar.”
“Just retaining water? Yeah, like the Hoover dam is retaining water.”
“Sure you’ll get your figure back. We’ll just search through 2004, where you left it.”
“Keys are on the fridge, honey. I’ll see you at the hospital at half-time.”
“Sure, the doctor said you’re eating for two, but I don’t think he meant two Orcas.”
“Honey, come show the guys your Brando impression.”
“Roseanne, what have you done with my wife?”
“How come you’re so much fatter than the other broads in Lemase?”
“Sweetheart, where’d you put that Victoria’s Secret catalogue?”
“Hey, when you’re finished pukin’ in there, get me a beer, willya?”
“Why in the world would I want to rub your feet?”
“That’s not a bun in the oven, that’s a whole freakin’ batch of bread!”
“You know, now that you mention it, you are getting fat and unattractive.”
“Oh, this is just great! Now, on top of everything else, I can look forward to paying child support.”
“Yo, fatty! You’re blocking the TV!”
“No, I don’t know where the remote is. Have you looked under your breasts?”

[Critter]

Damn Bump that's cold and I love it.

[mckinzie]

Your in rare form tonight Bumper